Norway Warns Residents To Stay Away From Friendly Whale Suspected As Russian ‘Spy’

[Sugar Cookie]

Norwegian government officials have warned residents to steer clear of a friendly beluga whale that experts say may be a Russian “spy” swimming along the country’s coastline.

The adorable sea creature, nicknamed Hvaldimir, was first spotted in 2019 wearing a harness branded “St. Petersburg” with mounts for an underwater camera — leading experts to believe he was trained by the Russian Navy.


The suspected slippery secret agent popped up again recently in the densely populated area of Inner Oslofjord, where he has been following boats and making a splash with folks on board, the Norwegian Directorate of Fisheries warned Wednesday.

Frank Bakke-Jensen, director of the agency, urged residents to “avoid contact” with Hvaldimir for the safety of the animal, even though he’s “tame and used to being around people.”

“We especially encourage people in boats to keep a good distance to avoid the whale being injured or, in the worst case, killed by boat traffic,” said Bakke-Jensen.

The aquatic mammal “suffered minor injuries, primarily from contact with boats,” and the “risk that the whale may be injured due to human contact has become significantly greater,” the agency said in a statement.

In recent weeks, the white whale has been foraging for food at farms, “where it has been able to catch fish grazing on surplus feed,” it added.

Hvaldimir — whose cheeky nickname is combo of the Norwegian word for whale and Russian president Vladimir Putin — won’t be captured by officials despite his possible ties to the country.


“We have always communicated that the whale in question is a free-living animal and we see no reason to capture it and put it behind barriers,” Bakke-Jensen said.

His movements will, however, be monitored by marine officials.

Continue reading at link

Norway warns residents to stay away from friendly whale suspected as Russian ‘spy’

The adorable sea creature, nicknamed Hvaldimir, was first spotted in 2019 wearing a harness branded “St. Petersburg” with mounts for an underwater camera.

nypost.com

 

[Symmachus]

INT. РУССКАЯ ВОЕННАЯ КОМНАТА

Вокруг стола в полумраке собралось несколько человек. Во главе стола Владимир, лысый от природы мужчина средних лет, среднего телосложения и телосложения.

ВЛАДИМИР​

Хм. Мы хотим собрать информацию о норвежцах. Итак, как мы можем сделать это таким образом, чтобы люди Норвегии могли относиться к этому, не слишком разоблачая, что мы шпионим за ними?

АЛЕКСИЙ​

Я не знаю. Что происходит в Норвегии?

ДРУГОЙ ВЛАДИМИР​

Не важно. Я ничего не могу придумать.

ВИТАЛИЙ​

Вот идея: давайте пошлем некоторых из наших солдат, раскрасим их в черно-белый корпспейнт, убедимся, что у них очень длинные волосы и они не улыбаются, и отправим этих людей на норвежские блэк-металлические концерты, чтобы собрать информацию о тамошних толпах. Наши супер-Квлт-солдаты будут носить гоу-про в мошпитах, и я думаю, что кадры могут быть очень полезны для нас.

АЛЕКСИЙ​

Но блэк-метал нравится не ВСЕМ в Норвегии. Нам нужно что-то, что обращается к МАССАМ.

ВЛАДИМИР​

Что же тогда всем нравится?

ИВАН​

Отправьте парня в костюме йети. Или, может быть, робот в костюме йети. Я уверен, что в Норвегии масса криптозоологической шумихи по поводу «Невидимого снежного человека» и тому подобного.

ЕЩЕ ОДИН ВЛАДИМИР​

Но тогда он будет зрелищем, потому что тогда норвежцы скажут: «Я видел невидимого снежного человека! Я видел невидимого снежного человека!» Тогда они захотят указать на него и сделать это слишком очевидным.

ВИТАЛИЙ​

Я думаю, что эта идея очень непрактична, но это дает мне одну идею.

ДРУГОЙ ВЛАДИМИР​

Ладно, возьми это на нас.

СЕРГЕЙ​

Норвегия имеет большую береговую линию...

ВЛАДИМИР​

Да.

СЕРГЕЙ​

... и, следовательно, это очень морская нация ...

ВЛАДИМИР​

Действительно.

СЕРГЕЙ​

...поэтому многие норвежцы, естественно, любят китов...

ВЛАДИМИР​

Ага.

СЕРГЕЙ​

... так что, если мы отправим им действительно дружелюбного кита с прикрепленными повсюду камерами? И пометить кита как принадлежащего нам, но не в стиле "мы отправляем дружественного кита шпионить за вашими гражданами"? Как звук?

ВЛАДИМИР​

Почему, это ВЕЛИКОЛЕПНО! Все за?

КАЖДЫЙ​

(в унисон)
Да.

ВЛАДИМИР​

Против?

Никто не отвечает.

ВЛАДИМИР​

Это решено. Мы отправляем дружественного кита к норвежцам. А теперь, кто хочет выпить водки?

Весь зал какофонически восторженно гудит от перспективы пить водку.

КОНЕЦ.

(translation supplied by translate.google.com)
-----

INT. RUSSIAN WAR ROOM

Multiple people are gathered around the table in a shadowy setting. At the head of the table is Vladimir, a naturally bald, middle-age man of average physical stature and composition.

VLADIMIR​

Hmm. We want to gather intelligence on the Norwegians. So, how can we do that in a way that the people of Norway can relate to without it being too revealing that we're spying on them?

ALEXIY​

I don't know. What goes on in Norway?

OTHER VLADIMIR​

Nothing really. I can't think of anything.

VITALY​

Here's an idea: let's send some of our soldiers, paint them in black and white corpsepaint, make sure they have very long hair and do not smile, and send these men to Norway's black metal concerts to gather intelligence on the crowds there. Our super-Kvlt soldiers would be wearing go-pros in the mosh pits, and I think the footage could be very useful for us.

ALEXIY​

But black metal doesn't appeal to EVERYONE in Norway. We need something that appeals to the MASSES.

VLADIMIR​

What appeals to everyone, then?

IVAN​

Send a guy in a Yeti costume. Or maybe a robot in a Yeti costume. I'm sure Norway has a ton of cryptozoological hype about the "Invisible Snowman" and whatever.

YET ANOTHER VLADIMIR​

But then he'll be a spectacle because then Norwegians would say, "I saw the Invisible Snowman! I saw the Invisible Snowman!" They would then want to point to him and make it too obvious.

VITALY​

I think that idea is very impractical, but that gives me one idea.

OTHER VLADIMIR​

Okay, lay it on us.

SERGEY​

Norway does have a lot coastline...

VLADIMIR​

Yes.

SERGEY​

...and it therefore is a highly nautical nation...

VLADIMIR​

Indeed.

SERGEY​

...therefore, many Norwegians would naturally like whales...

VLADIMIR​

Uh-huh.

SERGEY​

...so, what if we send them a really friendly whale with cameras attached all over? And label the whale as belonging to us, but not in a "we're sending a friendly whale to spy on your citizens" type of way? How's that sound?

VLADIMIR​

Why, that's BRILLIANT! All in favor?

EVERYONE​

(in unison)
Aye.

VLADIMIR​

Opposed?

Nobody responds.

VLADIMIR​

It is decided. We're sending a friendly whale to the Norwegians. Now, who's up for a round of vodka?

The whole room cacophonously clamors with enthusiasm at the prospect of drinking vodka.

END.

 

[thuumpr]

A good sniper could nail that electronics package!

 

[cubby]

I thought everybody knows you aren't supposed to talk about national secrets in front of the surveillance whale.

 

[Sugar Cookie]

A white beluga whale named “Hvaldimir,” first spotted in Norway not far from Russian waters with a harness that ignited rumors he may be a Moscow spy, has been found dead.

The Norwegian public broadcaster NRK reported that the whale carcass was found floating at the Risavika Bay in southern Norway Saturday by a father and son who were fishing.

The beluga, named by combining the Norwegian word for whale — hval — and Russian President Putin's first name Vladimir, was lifted out of the water with a crane and taken to a nearby harbor where experts will examine it.

“Unfortunately, we found Hvaldimir floating in the sea. He has passed away but it’s not immediately clear what the cause of death is,” marine biologist Sebastian Strand told NRK, adding that no major external injuries were visible on the animal.

Strand, who has monitored Hvaldimir's adventures for the past three years on behalf of the Norway-based Marine Mind non-profit organization, said he was deeply affected by the whale’s sudden death.

“It’s absolutely horrible,” Strand said. “He was apparently in good condition as of (Friday). So we just have to figure out what might have happened here.”

A celebrity 'Russian spy' whale spotted with harness found dead in Norwegian waters

A white beluga whale named “Hvaldimir,” first spotted in Norway not far from Russian waters with a harness that ignited rumors he may be a Moscow spy, has been found dead. The Norwegian public broadc...

www.yahoo.com

 

[the cat did it]

Strand said he was deeply affected by the whales sudden death, I was affected by the whales sudden death! I mean look at that adorable grinning face! He was not furry and lacking whiskers but I still would of wanted to pet and nuzzle that sweet face!! I would of peed myself with delight to just have been able to feed or pet him! I hope they find out what happened and I hope even more that this was not caused by a human. RIP you wonderful great white whale!

 

[BuffettGirl]

RIP Hvaldimir!

 

[thuumpr]

A celebrity 'Russian spy' whale spotted with harness found dead in Norwegian waters

A white beluga whale named “Hvaldimir,” first spotted in Norway not far from Russian waters with a harness that ignited rumors he may be a Moscow spy, has been found dead. The Norwegian public broadc...

www.yahoo.com

Cause of dearth? Maybe that extra 20mm blow hole.