Stop Shaming Victims of Sexual Assault for Not Reporting.
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“Why didn’t she report it before?” “Why didn’t she come forward a long time ago, right after it happened?”
Sixty-three percent of sexual assaults are not reported for a plethora of reasons.
Being sexually assaulted is one of the most shame inducing traumas that a person can experience. So it is understandable that victims don’t need to be further traumatized by being shamed for not reporting the crime. And yet, that is exactly what happens whenever we hear, for the first time, about a sexual assault that occurred months or years ago.
Shame is at the core of the intense emotional wounding women (and men) experience when they are sexually violated. Sexual assault is by its very nature humiliating and dehumanizing. The victim feels invaded and defiled while simultaneously experiencing the indignity of being helpless and at the mercy of another person. Self-blame is by far, the most devastating after effect of being sexually violated.
And of course as we live in a victim blaming culture in which one doesn't have to make any great leap to understand why victims are afraid to step forward for fear of being blamed for their own humiliating degradation and victimization.
We have an epidemic on our hands when it comes to sexual assault, with an estimated 321,500 Americans twelve and older being sexually assaulted each year.
The truth is, victims do not cause themselves to be raped. People can and frequently do abuse and rape others “without their permission,” and people can and do control others against their will. There is only one thing that causes a woman to be raped and that would be the rapist.