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Satanica

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[....]
Officers say the calls started coming in around 4:40 p.m. Monday.

They say witnesses reported seeing a SUV hit the median of the Lloyd Expressway near the Main Street exit. They say the crash caused a flat tire and the car to smoke, but the driver kept going.

Other callers say the driver was all over the road and now missing a front tire.

They say he eventually stopped at a car dealership and appeared “super drunk.”

Employees told police the driver, 30-year-old Jordon Mattingly, was trying to sell his SUV.
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Police say he had swelling and scratches as if he had just been in a crash.

They say Mattingly smelled of alcohol and almost fell several times. Officers say he tested .291 on a portable breath test.

Police say inside his SUV, they found Four Loko cans and a can of White Claw.

Mattingly is facing several charges.

He is the son of the manager for the Miami Marlins and former professional baseball player, Don Mattingly.

 
I had to look up Four Loco and White Claw. YIKES!! Mattingly doesn't believe in half measures.

He should have just put an ad on Craigslist to sell the car. He might have met the woman of his dreams at the same time!

 

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