A man who was arrested for manhandling his meat in the parking lot of a Florida Walmart told police he took matters into his own hands because he missed his girlfriend.
Cops were called after a shopper noticed the suspect’s self-love session inside a Kia parked outside the store.
Arriving officers said they found hard evidence of 26-year-old Kyle Weiss’ guilt.
“I noticed that he had an obvious erection protruding in his shorts,” a cop noted in the report.
Weiss initially told police he was at Walmart because he is an Uber eats driver, but choked under further questioning.
He eventually confessed he was performing a sex act on himself because “he is lonely as his ex-girlfriend is in Colorado,” the police report states.
Weiss was arrested for exposure of sexual organs and disorderly conduct and released on $1,000 bond.
nypost.com
