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Turd Fergusen

Veteran Member
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JANUARY 19--After jail deputies conducting a strip search spotted what appeared to be a crack pipe “hanging from her vagina,” a Florida Woman claimed that the item was actually a sex toy and not drug paraphernalia, according to an arrest affidavit.

Carmela Ann Manies, 57, was busted yesterday on a warrant charging her with failing to appear in court in connection with an alleged theft last year at a Walmart store.

While Manies was being processed into the Pinellas County jail, a booking officer “observed an anomaly” after the inmate passed through a full-body scanner. During a subsequent strip search, jailers reported, a “glass pipe was protruding from defendant’s vagina.”

Manies removed the pipe from her body, threw it on the ground, and “stepped on it in an effort to destroy evidence,” investigators allege.

Seen above, Manies then “attempted to explain away the glass pipe as a sex toy to staffers,” reported Deputy James Upton, who added that the pipe remnants had “burnt markings” and was “consistent with a pipe commonly used to smoke crack cocaine.”

Manies was charged with introducing contraband into a detention facility and tampering with evidence, both felonies. She is locked up in lieu of $3500 bond.

Full Article:
 
Cuntraband.

Get it?





Just popped into my head, unbidden, like so many thoughts, and posting it at this humorous cesspool seemed about right. Y'all are welcome.

When I finish entering terminal senescence, this shit's gonna just dribble outa my mouth, to whomever's unlucky enough to be listening. Hopefully, they'll understand. Given the preponderance of DD elder abuse stories, I think I'll opt for the Soylent Green deluxe exit strategy.

};^D
 
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