Ontario: Two Old Ladies Throw Down and get to Fisticuffs over Bingo Chair

[Siobhan]

Never underestimate the volatility of the elderly when it comes to their favorite pastimes and placements, because they may surprise you with a sudden roundhouse punch, or three.

Ontario Provincial Police have announced that they won't be bringing charges against two elderly women, ages 79 and 86, after they were involved in a physical altercation, over a chair at a bingo table.
Officers from the Rideau Lakes Department were called in Tuesday afternoon to investigate a reported assault in a long term care facility. Upon their arrival, the OPP officers learned that two of the elderly female patients had been in a physical dispute over a particular chair that they both wanted to sit in during a nice soothing game of bingo.

The ladies first began by loudly arguing over the chair, which shortly led to them slugging it out over same said chair, and then it snowballed from there, with other residents joining in the brawl and bruhaha - assumingly to either side with one lady or the other, or perhaps just for the sake of a good old fashioned smack down being far more exciting than the usually scheduled bingo event.

According to the investigating officers, there were no reports of any of the residents being seriously injured... well, at least not physically, anyway.
There is no information if any canes or walkers succumbed to any injuries during the resulting brawl.

https://www.thewhig.com/news/local-news/two-women-79-and-86-cause-bingo-brawl-opp-report

Shout out and thanks to @ghosttruck for the original article!

 

[Sugar Cookie]

I want a Worldstarhiphop video for this one.

 

[Totemic]

Do NOT fuck with ladies and their bingo. That shit is a lethal risk.

 

[Knox]

Is it bad that I laughed? Because I totally did.

 

[Turd Fergusen]

This is the lamest article I've read in a while. How the fuck did this make the news??

 

[Knox]

This is the lamest article I've read in a while. How the fuck did this make the news??

I'll give you that, but come on!! Two old ladies duking it out?! That's funny!!

 

[lithiumgirl]

@Knox ... what did you do to your hair ?

You looked younger when it was brown ... 27 maybe, now you look like a 45 year old teacher.

Good thing you could change it over night if you wanted.

 

[Knox]

@Knox ... what did you do to your hair ?

You looked younger when it was brown ... 27 maybe, now you look like a 45 year old teacher.

Good thing you could change it over night if you wanted.

I didn't do anything to my hair. The blonde is my natural hair color and I dye it dark. It's still dark. So glad it worried you.

 

[lithiumgirl]

. So glad it worried you.

Oh you look like that all the time ... ? I haven't been blonde since grade one ... I'm glad, they turn me off, they remind me of sour milk. I wasn't worried ... repulsed is probably more accurate. But okay ... tell yourself I was worried about you and be glad I guess.

 

[Knox]

Oh you look like that all the time ... ? I haven't been blonde since grade one ... I'm glad, they turn me off, they remind me of sour milk. I wasn't worried ... repulsed is probably more accurate. But okay ... tell yourself I was worried about you and be glad I guess.

Lith, sorry you're bored. Looks mean nothing to me. They are not what's important. It's whether you're pretty on the inside or not that's important. So if you think I'm ugly, good for you!

 

[lithiumgirl]

Lith, sorry you're bored. Looks mean nothing to me. They are not what's important. It's whether you're pretty on the inside or not that's important. So if you think I'm ugly, good for you!

I didn't say you were ugly ... I said you looked younger with brown hair. If you were glad you worried me (haha ... jokes) are you really pretty on the inside ??? I guess it doesn't matter now ... like look at your hair.

 

[Knox]

I didn't say you were ugly ... I said you looked younger with brown hair. If you were glad you worried me (haha ... jokes) are you really pretty on the inside ??? I guess it doesn't matter now ... like look at your hair.

Again, my hair is still dark as I like it dark better too. I can't help the genes I was born with. My entire family is blonde. I just put that picture up as someone earlier asked if I was blonde why do I dye it?

 

[lithiumgirl]

I just put that picture up as someone earlier asked if I was blonde why do I dye it?

I'm going with so you don't like a 45 year old teacher ???

 

[Knox]

I'm going with so you don't like a 45 year old teacher ???

I'm an almost 27 year old human resource worker.

 

[lithiumgirl]

I'm an almost 27 year old human resource worker.

And when you had brown hair ... you looked it.

 

[Knox]

And when you had brown hair ... you looked it.

I still have brown hair. I love you Lith.

 

[lithiumgirl]

I still have brown hair. I love you Lith.

You really should fuck off with that picture than ... it makes you look

 

[Knox]

You really should fuck off with that picture than ... it makes you look

Nope. I'm gonna keep it for a few days just so you have to look at it. That's me in my natural state. Albeit with a bit more eyeliner. I love eyeliner and mascara. I do not leave home without them.

 

[lithiumgirl]

Well I don't have to really look at it @Knox ... i can avert my eyes ... you know ?

 

[Knox]

Well I don't have to really look at it @Knox ... i can avert my eyes ... you know ?

Well you go girl, whatever it takes to get you thru

 

[Keepalowprofile]

. two of the elderly female patients had been in a physical dispute over a particular chair that they both wanted to sit in during a nice soothing game of bingo.

I bet there was some old man they were both wanting to sit next to.

 

[lithiumgirl]

I bet there was some old man they were both wanting to sit next to.

Oh my God ... you're probably right. I wonder if they got banned from the hall and have to play someplace else now. My ex's mom loved bingo ... She used to buy us stuff when she won. I personally only played once in my life and never will again ... ever!

 

[notchback]

@Knox ... what did you do to your hair ?

You looked younger when it was brown ... 27 maybe, now you look like a 45 year old teacher.

Good thing you could change it over night if you wanted.

Funny. When I first saw the new avatar, I clicked on it so I could see a bigger version. My first thought was "Damn, she's hot".

 

[lithiumgirl]

Funny. When I first saw the new avatar, I clicked on it so I could see a bigger version. My first thought was "Damn, she's hot".

Did you rub you thigh real hard when you did it too ... ? Probably! Personally blondes ... pretty much all of them remind me of sour milk. The only exception over my life time has been Claudia Schiffer .... but I think I like that she is goofy looking more than anything ... and she is just so chic!

@Knox will be like claudia who ? because 80's and we're old.

 

[Knox]

Did you rub you thigh real hard when you did it too ... ? Probably! Personally blondes ... pretty much all of them remind me of sour milk. The only exception over my life time has been Claudia Schiffer .... but I think I like that she is goofy looking more than anything ... and she is just so chic!

@Knox will be like claudia who ? because 80's and we're old.

Lith, no idea why you keep wanting to talk about my looks. They do not matter. They are not who I am. Why do they upset you so?

 

[lithiumgirl]

Lith, no idea why you keep wanting to talk about my looks. They do not matter. They are not who I am. Why do they upset you so?

Well I wasn't talking to you, I was talking about Claudia, my preferences and quirks to someone else but okay ... delude your self.

 

[Knox]

Well I wasn't talking to you, I was talking about Claudia, my preferences and quirks but okay ... delude your self.

Yeah yeah, she's a German model. But you tagged me in it so you wanted me to see it.

 

[lithiumgirl]

Yeah yeah, she's a German model. But you tagged me in it so you wanted me to see it.

Did you google that ... I've loved her forever. Otherwise ... Of course I tagged you ... What do you think I'm going to do, talk behind you back. Like there are exceptions ... I talk to @BuffettGirl sometimes ... about how easy you guys are ... but its five word responses like ... and just like that ... spin ! Which I feel I don't need to tag you for, because you were there.

 

[notchback]

Funny. When I first saw the new avatar, I clicked on it so I could see a bigger version. My first thought was "Damn, she's hot".

So, @Kiss_My_Axe l you gave me a thumbs up. What's your story? You just joined on Tuesday and I don't think I've seen an intro thread yet. You look pretty good in your Avatar pic also. Unfortunately, the date on it is about 9 years ago. Let's see something new. You look a little like @Dead Stephanie, but I haven't seen her around for a bit.

And I'm probably making a damn fool of myself now.

 

[Fellofftheporch]

And I'm probably making a damn fool of myself now.

Nah, that's my job. I'm the one always wondering into left field and missing something. All while thinking I'm walking down the runway or something.