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Morbid

Rooster Illusion
Staff member
I know this has a high probablilty of turning into a clusterfuck, but I want to set some things straight after receiving several PMs from different members regarding "doxing" and the like.

First off, doxing is not finding public info on someone... doxing is releasing private info on someone. In other words, posting someone's real name, address, phone numbers, places of employment, etc, etc - if all of that info is private - is doxing. Using Google to search for someone's name and posting their 2004 Myspace page or LinkedIn profile is not.

Now that that's out of the way, we had a member here, who has not been here in almost eight years, who got into nasty fights with other members on this forum - the majority of those members who are also no longer here. These people gave as good as they got, and there were rumors of husbands being called, DFC having been called, etc, etc. Just nasty business all around and the reason for my quote that Nell uses in her signature - all of which happened almost eight years ago.

More recent drama, and digging of personal public info on members, was done primarily by one member and her co-hort, who are both not here any longer.

Anyway, point being, if you do not want the possibility of your personal life being messed with, then don't put it out on a public forum. The main reason why we took down the last boob thread was because of the slew of messages we recieved later from people asking that we take them down, and the pictures being used during online spats.

Look, this isn't 4-chan, 8-chan, kiwi farms, etc... but it isn't a "mommy" site either. We attract weird people because of the subject matter. Does that mean you shouldn't be yourself or reveal personal info to other members? That's your call.

I always look at like this: Think of your worst enemy - real or imagined - and how much information would you hand over to them for ammo against you? Well this is a public forum, people, not a privatre club where all members are vetted before being let through the door.

So if you have any questions or concerns, feel free to voice them here. I will try to elaborate or detail any past situations (like the Mean Girls fiasco) that has happened on the site. Hell, I wouldn't doubt some of the people who are here and have been accused of certain things would love to chime in to clear the air.
 
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Think of your worst enemy - real or imagined - and how much information would you hand over to them for ammo against you?

This, so much. When I was a kid, I got a priceless piece of advice from my grandfather. "Never put anything down on paper you don't want the rest of the world to see." It's a different time, now, but the message is as important as ever.

It just so happens that I'm fine with the world seeing pretty much everything. :hilarious:
 
I swear to God....

Ok fuck it. I will answer any questions about the last EIGHT GODDAMN YEARS for two days. Then I'm out and I'm going to Vegas. And I really don't know if I'm coming back.
 
I swear to God....

Ok fuck it. I will answer any questions about the last EIGHT GODDAMN YEARS for two days. Then I'm out and I'm going to Vegas. And I really don't know if I'm coming back.

YOU ARE NOT GOING ANYWHERE! YOU HEAR ME
 
I swear to God....

Ok fuck it. I will answer any questions about the last EIGHT GODDAMN YEARS for two days. Then I'm out and I'm going to Vegas. And I really don't know if I'm coming back.
Have a safe trip to Vegas and lots of fun.
 
I swear to God....

Ok fuck it. I will answer any questions about the last EIGHT GODDAMN YEARS for two days. Then I'm out and I'm going to Vegas. And I really don't know if I'm coming back.

@Nell I really hope you come back - I have always liked you and your replies and comments - I have never thought of you as a bully AT ALL, more like the momma hen who pops in when needed to help put people back in place etc :) in a loving motherly way witha fun bit of sarcasm n sass mixed in

that being said - I feel like I have been trying to keep up on everything going on... STR and Kat seemed to be getting on peoples nerves and then BAM (i get lost) - somehow Nells getting bashed for something that happend 8 years ago - that was only brought up by DGIAF which had NOTHING to do with the NOW and just seemed to just rile everything and everyone up???

on the other hand now seeing what happened to @DIAFplease n whoever else was effected, I would prob be quick to jump etc too (sorry that happened to you <3, can I just say from outside looking in, you and Nell seemed to be ok both being on this site - maybe she did get sucked into the mean girls BUT she saw what it was doing - passed the info along to you, seemed to apologize and has "moved on/changed her ways/saw her err? Its been 8 years - why attack, rehash n bash her now (Cant we all just hit a bong, or get along or whatever? (BUT) it also seems like what happened in the past is NOT EVEN HAPPENING RIGHT NOW??? I'm so confused :confused:..

I thought DIAF was going off the deep end trying to protect Kat for some reason THEN all of a sudden she keeps mentioning Fray being doxed or whatever - and from everything I have seen everyone seems to love Fray??? how did this go from protecting Kat and Str to bashing Nell, to saying its about Fray??? I know i'm blonde and all but geesh I cant keep up
 
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Fairly new here still. Don't care much about the past. Do care very much if it's still happening. My email address I use for here is not hooked up to any other site or any other email I have. So you'll pretty much find a empty email if you look me up.

However. If people are being hurt or have been the people who are doing it should be banned.

Yes, we're adults. Yes, this is the interwebs. Keep private what you should, don't ever trust anybody and do no harm.

Just my probably unimportant opinion.
 
However. If people are being hurt or have been the people who are doing it should be banned.

Members may believe differently, but I am pretty up on all the drama that takes place in these forums. In the past, I was wrapped up in it... when that blew up in my face and we lost a good number of long-time members, I stopped giving a shit about any of it unless it border-lined illegal, or effected the site in other, negative ways.

As a public forum, I will never make everyone happy so I don't try to. My goal these days is just to keep it profitable and not a pain in my ass. I do not miss the days when I spent way too much time on the phone listening to people cry about mean shit a stranger said to them on the forums.

But banning people because they are accused of something isn't workable because savvy people can manipulate that as well. People who truly interfered with another user's personal life have been banned, or left on their own accord and have never come back (that we know of).

Unless there is solid proof that a member actually, by true definition, doxxed another member, I am not wasting any time investigating. If members are laughing about someone's Justin Bieber fan page they made in 2002, who cares when compare to the overall grand-scheme of real life problems.

People are mean, especially when gifted with anonymity, and despite what the media would like people to believe when it comes to the Internet, women can be the nastiest, cattiest of users.

I don't mean that it any misogynist way, it's just a fact from my standpoint from running this place for a decade... and I'd be shocked if any member here disagreed.

On the other hand, these "issues" seem so non-issue-ish to me that I rarely bother intervening anymore. I am too old to start babysitting people who are too old to be babysat.
 
@Nell I really hope you come back - I have always liked you and your replies and comments - I have never thought of you as a bully AT ALL, more like the momma hen who pops in when needed to help put people back in place etc :) in a loving motherly way witha fun bit of sarcasm n sass mixed in

that being said - I feel like I have been trying to keep up on everything going on... STR and Kat seemed to be getting on peoples nerves and then BAM (i get lost) - somehow Nells getting bashed for something that happend 8 years ago - that was only brought up by DGIAF which had NOTHING to do with the NOW and just seemed to just rile everything and everyone up???

on the other hand now seeing what happened to @DIAFplease n whoever else was effected, I would prob be quick to jump etc too (sorry that happened to you <3, can I just say from outside looking in, you and Nell seemed to be ok both being on this site - maybe she did get sucked into the mean girls BUT she saw what it was doing - passed the info along to you, seemed to apologize and has "moved on/changed her ways/saw her err? Its been 8 years - why attack, rehash n bash her now (Cant we all just hit a bong, or get along or whatever? (BUT) it also seems like what happened in the past is NOT EVEN HAPPENING RIGHT NOW??? I'm so confused :confused:..

I thought DIAF was going off the deep end trying to protect Kat for some reason THEN all of a sudden she keeps mentioning Fray being doxed or whatever - and from everything I have seen everyone seems to love Fray??? how did this go from protecting Kat and Str to bashing Nell, to saying its about Fray??? I know i'm blonde and all but geesh I cant keep up
I don't really see the question but I'll try to explain.

8 years ago a member by the name of Peeperann was quite popular and well known. Maybe you remember the pizza a website sent Casey Anthony when she was bailed out of jail? That was her. Anyway she was friends with everyone and got all our personal info by sending gifts and such. When it turned out that she had lied about numerous portions of her life people got mad and called her out. All of this is in an old bullshit thread around here somewhere. She didn't take kindly to being exposed as a liar and so she started calling people's spouses, Workplaces, etc. Then she called DCF on me. When that wasn't enough she started to spam ever single thread with people's real names, phone numbers and addresses. She was banned and returned under her nieces screen name. Did the same again, was banned again and eventually left.

All was quiet for about five years or so. Then China came here. I thought she was really nice and not having learned my lesson with Peeperann I became friends with her and gave her my real name and address. She, PJ, Whisper and I were friends on FB. It started as a place to chat that wasn't DD. China jokingly named the "group" Mean Girls. It passed the time of day, because I am home alone a lot and I use this place to socialize.

All was fine until they decided they did not like some members here, and started to look them up and make fun of them. DIAF was one of them. I did not like this and told them so as I began to distance myself from them. I sat for a few and brooded on it then decided to tell DIAF that her whole internet life was wide open, including an old livejournal, and to lock it down. I was trying to do a kindness to her and also not upset China because believe it or not the bitch was starting to scare me, in A Peeperann kind of way. So I said that Valasca told me about the livejournal, because that's what China had relayed to me. About this time I decided I was out and invited Obsolete to take over my Facebook and read all the "Mean Girl" shit so I had a witness that I didn't look people up and I didn't like it. This all then imploded and screenshots were shared and consequently I am no longer friends with them. And they still harass me on other sites, including BBC, where they came to tell me how delighted they were that Keisha lost her uterus and how they hoped she had died.

I am sorry that I was ever associated with those women. I don't know why this has been brought back up. Because I don't like Kat and have told her so I'm a horrible person and deserve days of this now? I don't think so. And I don't think frayed has anything to worry about. Especially not from me. I've been through this. Twice now. It fucking sucks and I wouldn't put anyone else through what I've been through.

Any other questions? I want to get this over with today if possible.
 
That China, PJ and (other well known poster) on FB was some straight bullshit and hurt a lot of people. @Nell on my end I didn't hear anything negative about your part other than you became friends with the wrong people and they tried to pull you down when they went down.

They were trying to destroy your friendships with people.
 
This was hella long (yes, I still use the word hella, so sue me. :p), but the things that go on here from time to time were going on when I first fell in love with IRC/BBS/forums in 1993, and will probably continue long after I melt into a glorious puddle of putrefaction.

Here's da meat -n- taters. See if any of this sounds familiar. ;)

4 Common Types of Power Struggle

1. First, we're going to start with defending your authority or credibility. Examples of this type of power struggle might sound something like this, "Who are you to tell me what to do?" "What gives you the right to tell me how to parent my child?"

For the person we're in a power struggle with, it can often feel like someone is not believing them, thinks they're a liar, or is always supporting someone else's point of view, not theirs. It immediately puts us on the defense when someone needs to defend their authority or credibility, or feels like they need to defend their authority or credibility.

2. A second type of power struggle we want to take a closer look at today involves what's called personal button pushing. This comes from the fact that the person you're struggling with knows you very well. They know what can really get under your skin and bother you, and they will keep setting you off until they get the reaction that they are looking for, knowing you'll feel bad about that, back down, and that they then win the power struggle. Maybe they know it's personal insults that can get under your skin, comments about your weight, your appearance, how you do your job, insulting something you said. Maybe it's a racial slur. Maybe it's a threat to harm your own children. But they know what can get to you, and will set off that button.

3. A third kind of power struggle we want to get familiar with and be aware of is rooted in the bringing up of past history or irrelevant issues. These kinds of power struggles often come from grudge holding, meaning the keeping of a scorecard where a person never has an opportunity to erase the checkmarks made against them. Think about comments that may give away this kind of power struggle is happening. Comments like, "You tried that same thing last week" or "I talked to your teacher from last school year, she said you did the same thing back then." Again, is there a keeping of a scorecard going on against an individual?

4. The fourth and final kind of power struggle involves making empty threats, or issuing ultimatums, meaning unfortunately our limits did not involve the giving of choices. This often happens out of anger where we might state extreme consequences, for example, or it could sound something like, "Don't do this or else" or "You need to do this because I said so." Often the individual we're in that kind of power struggle with sees it as an invitation to really test us to see if what we are saying is actually true. They're thinking, "I wonder if this person really means it, and will follow through." These kinds of power struggles can lead to a breakdown in trust, and the individual not feeling safe around us.

My usual ETA: You know I didn't author this b/c it has no errors, lol. <3 Carry on!
 
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I miss all the interesting stuff:pout:. I dunno who did what to whom:mad:, and when the mass exodus occurred:jawdrop:. I didn't even know there was drama on the site...:wtf: Sometimes I'm kinda oblivious:rolleyes: to a lot of stuff.:meh:

Don't make me throw y'all into a dungeon:wideyed: full of rats:nailbiting: and with Donald Trump's speeches blaring 24/7 :dead:

How come I never get that kind of attention:pout:? Because of my arthritis medicine:woot:, all I do is giggle:smug: and eat ice cream:hungry:. Maybe we should ALL get loaded before we post!:devil:
 
@carolinablue there were a couple mass exodus' ( <= is that accurate?) the last one was a couple of years ago I think when all of that 'mean girls' crap was going on and the group chat on FB that sank friendships like the Titanic.

I only popped up here and started talking finally after 8 years because the person who used to update my bold for me stopped dealing with DD after so I less mess so I figured I'd give it a try to see if I should actually stay or just keep paying in support of Morbid and the site.

That clusterfuck 2 years ago changed a lot of things. We all backed away a little and things haven't been the same since.
[doublepost=1461271205,1461271066][/doublepost]Which leads me to something that I've wondered since I've been back. What the hell happend to Dakota? I remember something on FB where she let her feelings be known about some things and I haven't seen her after that.
 
I haven't read anything in this thread. I just want to say I was told I gave a member another members LiveJournal link. I AM NOT NAMING EITHER MEMBER.
Yes, first member lied about me. So. Fucking. What. It was 2 years ago. WHY is it being brought back up now? It involved the other 2 members who aren't even here anymore.
Yes, I am a little angry to find this out now, but what can I do about it? Nothing. As far as I am concerned, that's OVER. First member has owned up to that shit. We have had private PMs today. That person has apologized and I'm accepting it.
To bring this back up now just shows pettiness. Calling everyone bitches and cunts is just childish. Also not very original.
Done. Move on.
 
Was that 2 years ago? Some drama here spilled to FB and she let people have it, then dipped out. Never saw her again.

Yes it was. She got pulled into some dumb shit and between Facebook and here enough was enough. And I can't say I blame her.
 
Ah ha. I disconnected back when that last bit of drama was still developing, and people thought I was pointing the finger at China prematurely (knew the bitch was a she-devil five minutes into her stay). I was actually accused of implicating her simply because I didn't like her, which is soooo not my style. I distanced myself before her she-devil status was ever confirmed, and never thought to find out how things ultimately shook out when I plugged back in.

Thanks, Nell, for some totally inconsequential but nonetheless enjoyable vindication. :)

As far as this new crop of bullshit is concerned, it does resemble the last crop. We've had waves of "Mean Girl" activity for a while, now. There will be a group of members who've been around for a while and all get along. Some new people will sign up, post in a derpy or nonconformist manner, and these established members absolutely cannot seem to turn a blind eye. They have to point out just how derpy or dramatic the new person is being... in every damn thread they find it in (and sometimes, even unrelated threads).

Suddenly, every third thread is about how stupid so and so is. Now, if the ratio of disgruntled old member vs. nonconforming new member were more even, it'd be no biggie. The problem is, it's usually three or four or five established members doing this to one or two new members. The established members aren't consciously ganging up, necessarily, but the new members definitely feel ganged up on, and not wrongly. Teams form. And, occasionally, this has led to some witch hunting and doxxing and messing around in those people's lives. More neutral established members will sometimes step in on behalf whoever they perceive to be persecuted and become targets themselves.

The players change, but the template remains the same. This time, though, it sort of looks like we all see it brewing and we're dragging it out into the light so it can't spread behind the scenes like it has in the past. And that's hopeful.
 
I imagine there are a lot of newbies and members who just don't pay attention, who are reading this and still wondering what is going on.

I won't say I have no clue, but I sure as hell couldn't clarify further than what's been said already, so I present you with satisfaction of another sort. It's probably all you're going to get, so enjoy.

Mmm... satisfying. (No moobs, or weird shit I promise. This time.)

ETA DAMN IT
 
The players change, but the template remains the same. This time, though, it sort of looks like we all see it brewing and we're dragging it out into the light so it can't spread behind the scenes like it has in the past. And that's hopeful.

That's why I like you after all these years, despite you being a pompous liberal. :night:
 
Ok fuck it. I will answer any questions about the last EIGHT GODDAMN YEARS for two days. Then I'm out and I'm going to Vegas. And I really don't know if I'm coming back.
Nell does not need to answer questions. You, mere mortals...bug off.
 
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