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ghosttruck

Level 57 Taco Wizard
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Florida man Thomas Devaney Lane referred to himself as “the saint” as he threatened to release his turtle army to destroy people in the town of Indialantic, according to police.

The 61-year-old is also accused of yelling obscenities and causing disturbances at businesses along N. Miramar Avenue on Sunday, including Starbucks Coffee, Surfanista Café and Sassy Granny’s Smoothies, Click Orlando reported.

As well as the turtle army threat, Lane allegedly warned people that they "would all see what would happen in an hour," an Indialantic Police Department affidavit said, Fox 35 Orlando reported.

Lane reportedly made his way to the police department lobby and banged on the glass but quickly left before an officer could meet him. Officers, who had received seven calls about Lane, subsequently found him in his vehicle at a 7-Eleven parking lot nearby.

He allegedly refused to get out of the vehicle when instructed by police and told a 911 operator that the officer “needed to leave now or you will all be sorry you f***ed with the saint,” Fox 35 reported.

Click Orlando reported that the officer then removed Lane from the car and placed him under arrest.

 
"Ten Minutes To Turtle-Town"
(Columbia Pictures, 1982)

Kenny Rogers in a role that will definitely surprise you. Turtles, poker and whiskey prove a potent combination that lead Thomas Lane (Kenny Rogers) to the brink of the abyss... and back. "Heartwarming and hilarious!" -Siskel and Ebert
 
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