Drunk woman stole lobster from tank at Red Lobster

[Turd Fergusen]

Well, that was shellfish of her.
A drunken Florida woman swiped a live crustacean from its tank at a local Red Lobster and escaped, The Smoking Gun reported.
Kimberly Gabel, 42, was busted for disorderly intoxication following the incident at the St. Petersburg eatery on Saturday.
Gabel was at the seafood joint at around 1:17 p.m. when she started to cause a disturbance and was asked to leave by a manager, according to an arrest affidavit obtained by the website.
The suspect, according to the arrest affidavit, then began cursing before reaching into the water tank containing live lobsters, grabbing one and bolting out the front door.
Gabel didn’t get very far, though.
A short time later, a cop noticed that she was “slurring her words and had a distinct odor of an alcoholic beverage,” the affidavit said.

Full Article:
https://nypost.com/2018/11/14/drunk-woman-stole-lobster-from-tank-at-red-lobster-cops/

 

[cubby]

Must be a professional drinker, shitfaced at 1pm.

I hope like hell the fact that she was walking around with a live lobster was a clue.

 

[ghosttruck]

I'm going to start a new saying..."Drunk enough to steal a lobster"

...hope it catches on

 

[Sejanus]

It is kinda evening things out for her I expect.
She has probably given enough guys crabs, she figured she was due a lobbie!

 

[Fellofftheporch]

That will teach em a lesson! Kick me out of Red Lobster!

 

[ghosttruck]

Update:

A judge today issued an arrest warrant for a woman accused of “removing and unnecessarily tormenting a live lobster from the tank” of a Florida seafood restaurant.

When Kimberly Gabel failed to show this afternoon for a pre-trial hearing at a Clearwater courthouse, a judge ordered the arrest of the 42-year-old.

Gabel was arrested in November for disorderly conduct after she allegedly caused a scene at a Red Lobster in St. Petersburg...

Arrest Warrant Issued For Woman Nabbed In Brazen Crustacean Heist At Red Lobster

A judge today issued an arrest warrant for a woman accused of “removing and unnecessarily tormenting a live lobster from the tank” of a Florida seafood restaurant. When Kimberly Gabel failed to show

www.thesmokinggun.com

 

[Fellofftheporch]

“to wit: removing and unnecessarily tormenting a live lobster from the tank of an establishment.”

A lobster that would soon be dead anyway when someone ordered him off the menu.

 

[Brillig]

So... What happened to the lobster?

 

[Keepalowprofile]

. unnecessarily tormenting a live lobster from the tank” of a Florida seafood restaurant.

In my mind's eye, I just saw a drunk crazy bitch laughing and making drunk faces at a lobster.

 

[ChaosKitty]

I'm going to start a new saying..."Drunk enough to steal a lobster"

...hope it catches on

that is actually a go to for drunken idiots near lobster tanks have heard of it happening over half a dozen times & many get pinched