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ghosttruck

Level 57 Taco Wizard
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MAY 3--Sometimes the suspects just come to you.

Two Florida lovebirds are facing criminal charges after they were caught having sex Monday night on the sidewalk outside police headquarters in Key West, according to an arrest report.

Cops say that Gary Hill and Crystal Frances had shared a pint of vodka before they began trysting in public. Cops learned about the coupling around 9 PM from a female passerby who reported that a duo was poised to have sex in front of headquarters.

When a patrolman went outside to investigate, he spotted the 46-year-old Hill with his pants down having sex with Frances (who was not wearing pants or underwear). The couple, lying down on the sidewalk, was "actively engaging in sexual intercourse," police charge.

“I’m horny,” Hill explained when confronted by the officer. “She was giving it up to me right then and there.” Hill (seen above) would also chalk up the illicit encounter as “a Key West moment.”

Hill was arrested for indecent exposure and booked into the Monroe County jail on the misdemeanor charge. Hill, whose address is listed as “Streets of Key West” in jail records, is locked up on $7500 bond and scheduled for arraignment on May 21.

Frances was not arrested at the scene since she was severely intoxicated and was taken to a hospital for treatment.

 
From the police report at the link:

"I could not understand what Frances was saying due to her intoxication, but her facial expressions gave me the impression she was angry and wasn't going to go peacefully."

Also,

"Frances was transported to the hospital in reference to her intoxication and possible ingestion of narcotics."

Drugs were involved??? Shocking. Does sound like a truly magical Key West moment indeed.
 
"down having sex with Frances (who was not wearing pants or underwear). The couple, lying down on the sidewalk, was "actively engaging in sexual intercourse,"

OMG can you guys imagine the road rash she is gonna have? No pants, no chonies, bare sidewalk? She's a savage. GET IT GIRL! Get that dirty, drunk, homeless wang!
Pardon me, I'm going to go vomit my chicken wrap from lunch now....

As far as the "Key West Moment"
is he wrong tho? Bc we all read them Florida stories lol
 
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