PRESTONBURG, KY — Mark Anthony Gilliam, 21, and Tabitha Ann Compton, 20, are Kentucky trash. And, like trash, you always know when they're around; trailer park drama follows them wherever they go, like the stench of boiled cabbage and failure.
On Sunday, the 16th of December, said stench followed them to Trimble Chapel Church, where local children were performing in a Christmas Play called "It's The Gift that Counts." Some of Gilliam's kids were in the play, so he attended with Compton, who is his Bitch Of The Moment.
"It's The Gift that Counts" is described as "an emotional presentation of the Gospel... focus[ed] on finding God's greatest gift to us." A children's play about God's love for us, and Christmas. In church. On Sunday. What could be more holy and festive?
You just know the Trailer Twins are gonna fuck it up for everybody.
And they didn't disappoint.
Before the play could even start, Compton got into an argument with Gilliam's wife.
That's right, Gilliam took his Side Piece to see his kids in a play, knowing full well The Wife would be there.
The resulting fracas is almost as predictable as it is comic.
Angry words quickly turned to Stoogish violence, as they often do in the Trailer Park Territories, and the now-brawling throng spilled outside. Gilliam defended his new love by punching his wife and then choking her. Not to be outdone, Compton knocked down the wife's mother, who was holding the youngest of the Gilliam brood. The pastor tried to break things up and got punched.
Things went downhill from there.
When Kentucky State Police troopers arrived, "the entire congregation," who had collectively had enough of Gilliam's bullshit, had surrounded the parking lot, and someone had blocked the access road with a pickup truck to keep the miscreants from escaping.
Of course, Gilliam was uncooperative, lunging at officers and resisting arrest. When they finally got him cuffed, he was hit with a slew of minor charges. Compton got a few as well: fourth-degree assault (child abuse) and second-degree disorderly conduct. The following day, the pastor filed a separate complaint that netted Gilliam an extra count of fourth-degree assault.
Both have been arraigned, and both pled not guilty, of course. The judge set minor bond amounts and handed out "no contact" orders all around.
No doubt nothing substantial will come of all this, and these two nitwits will do it all again in the not-too-distant future, maybe at a Walmart, maybe in a parking lot outside of a bar or in the middle of a field during a moonshine-fueled hootenanny.
Their utter worthlessness having been noted, I will give them credit where it is due: these two managed to electrify and unify the congregation of Trimble Chapel Church; never before has The Word, preached by pastor David Bowling, brought everyone together like that.